Two years today. I can’t even believe I’ve lived through those very words…much less…all the days since you’ve been gone.
If only I could go back and stop the clock maybe, just maybe I could somehow stop the blood clot! The very blocked blood doctors think took your life that day – declared at 12:16 pm on January 21, 2018 on the ice reffing a hockey game.
Still the hardest part is as much as I miss you I would never want to go back and have to relive the grief that has come with your loss. Ugh. Grief is sooo very heavy! I always tell people until it’s your story, it’s not your story. So don’t even worry about it. In the end life – or death – for that matter will find its way to each of us in its own time. So until then, #MakeYourDashCount.
In a strange way I’m grateful I don’t have to fear it anymore. I know what it’s capable of. Yet, as I think of your own existence, your life and death and my own – for that matter – and your fortunate connection to an undisclosed universe this side of Heaven, I remember that’s what it’s all about. It’s simply a matter of fact.
Matter! Three states: solid, liquid and gas. It’s the Trinity, of how we each move through space and time as we know it. Our spirit is created of liquid water. Plasma, the very blood of life…and then changing phase to experience this earth in solid state, a physical form when we are born until we die, when we simply change phase to become vapor or the gas, the fuel, necessary to charge our soul to life beyond this place.
Its like the tears I cry, the rain that falls or the very breath we take and make to store up for the next life in need. So if you’re not here then I trust you are there! For we know all matter created cannot be destroyed, bringing peace to my unsettled Soul. Every day without you is survival. In all ways, always.
I am now forced to move through life living an innocence lost to soon and a different perspective on death beyond. Yet in my beating, physical heart this side of Heaven I trust and believe. All is well with your Soul…because in the beginning…just as the end… your life mattered! Just like each of ours does. I no longer fear death, for in death there stores the fuel for continued life. 💝 at God Speed!
Its any wonder I still see you all around my sweetest Dean Blixt.
#MakeYourDashCount
#dcbj 65-18
#stoptheclot
#SoulandScience